Climbing Mt Ngauruhoe

Holidays over. Phew. And a new month, which is even better, cos July has been, quite frankly, a stinker.

Yep, you guessed it, moany post alert! I haven’t had one for a while so I figure I’m due one.

Keeping going with this writing stuff hasn’t got any easier I’m afraid. I’ve stoppped thinking of climbing Everest. I’m now thinking in terms of Ngauruhoe. This is a mountain in NZ – for all you LOTR fans out there, it’s Mt Doom. Which is a very appropriate title.

Why the change? Well, with Everest if you have the right equipment and skill level, and the weather is on your side, you can get to the top. I admit that in my forays up Everest my skill wasn’t great, nor my equipment the best. But then you don’t know these things until you fall off. The other thing I needed was the weather but somehow or other, the right combination of skill, equipment and weather has never lined up favourably for me. However, the thing about Everest is that I mostly enjoyed climbing it.

But I’m not these days which is why it feels like I’m climbing Ngauruhoe instead. This is a mountain comprised totally of shale. Climbing it is like climbing a massive sand dune. One step up, two steps back. There’s no joy in climbing it (at least, when I actually did climb it years ago, I hated every moment of it), because all you do is trudge and keep trudging. What you need to get to the top is dogged determination and the belief you can do it.

And that’s what I’m struggling to find. Dogged determination and self belief. One step forward is always accompanied by two steps back. It’s dispiriting.Which makes it hard to keep going. What’s the point when no matter how hard you climb, you don’t get any higher?

So, what do you all do when you’re feeling this way? Got any tips for me? God knows I could use ’em! 🙂

12 thoughts on “Climbing Mt Ngauruhoe”

  1. Jackie – I don’t like seeing you miserable. How about a few days of change? Push whatever is dragging you down aside and write something totally different. A Teen story, A Suspense, A Paranormal, A Medical! And don’t stop to worry about checking the “facts” just spend a few days immersed in something totally different!
    It might do you the world of good xx

  2. it’s late here and I can’t think of many words of advice but I’d like to echo what Scarlet said – write something totally different. Try to recapture the love. Read, watch movies… easy to say but try to remove the pressure! I love ya, yanno?

  3. Jeez Jackie, for one terrible moment I thought you were actually going to climb that bloody mountain! Heart attack! Stay at the bottom and drink chocolate martini’s, my friend.
    Right. Here’s what you’ve gotta do. Go to you tube, and play ‘when the going gets tough, the tough get going’ – REALLY loud. Dance around your living room like an idiot. Laugh. Then stick on the Rocky theme and box to really rev yourself up!! lol! Then sit down at your computer and write from your heart – not to fit a line, not to suit someone else. Write what you love, and i’ll bet that everyone else will love it to. You know why? Because you are a tip tip writer, and there is a niche out there waiting just for you.
    Come on girl!
    *get’s down off soap box and slinks off to fetch wine*

  4. Scarlet – thanks m’dear. I’m actually quite liking the thing I’m writing, it’s just my self doubt is pretty high. I kind of hoped I’d be getting some of it back but… Anyway, I do have an idea for something different. Might give it a go. 🙂

    Rach – I know, hon. And thanks. Reclaiming the love is the hard part. Ha!

    Jo – Good thinking Batman! Chocolate martinis and Youtube here I come!!! Actually, as I was saying to Scarlet, the thing I’m rewriting at the moment, I’m having fun with. I just want to be able to push aside all the crap that goes with it! 🙂

  5. Agree with all of the advice above!! I also think a little extra “down time” to refill the well is in order. Did that myself last week and felt worlds better.

    Good luck!!

  6. Suzanne – A big YES to that. I really need to stop thinking. Thinking sucks. 🙂

    Aimee – yeah, that can be a good idea. I have taken some time out but sometimes it just makes it harder to find the enthusiasm to get back into it. Oh well.

  7. If you stand still long enough on Ngauruhoe do you just slide back to the bottom?

    There are some fab romcoms floating around out there just waiting for you to watch them. I’m a little lacking on motivation side at the moment. “Research” is helping 😉

  8. I agree with Scarlet and Jo — both give wonderful advice. But I think Suz has hit the nail on the head. The closer you get, the harder you try the worse the feelings of doom/impending failure are. You’re still in the game and you’re doing wonderfully.

    No worries, you definitely have the right equipment and I just know the weather is changing for you :-]

  9. Caroline – I don’t think crampons work on shale! I’ll give it a go anyway. 🙂

    Catherine – Sometimes i feel like I’m playing a totally different game from the one everyone else is playing! Sigh. I wish everyone would come and play with me instead. Thanks for the faith. I appreciate it. 🙂

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